An Eggcelent Sunday Sermon

As the sun rises on a lazy Sunday morning and I rub the sleep from my eyes, my thoughts turn to a Sunday morning indulgence that I sometimes allow myself. A simple plan, eggs, bacon, the Sunday paper and an obligation free morning. As I assemble the troops for my attack on the tastebuds, I notice something odd, not glaringly obvious but definitely a little off. My dozen eggs are not a dozen after all. Without any fanfare, notification or packaging modifications I have unwillingly purchased a carton of TEN eggs. That’s right, TEN eggs. Now I know what you are thinking, who cares? So you’ve missed out on a couple of eggs big deal! But it really got me thinking.

I purchased this product with a dozen eggs in mind, a lifelong, universally accepted volume of an everyday product. It is packed in an identical form to the standard dozen eggs albeit slightly shorter in length. It is positioned on the Supermarket shelves around or directly within the one dozen egg cartons. The only logical conclusion that I can draw from this travesty is that the producers of these eggs didn’t want me to realise that I was buying TEN eggs. Maybe just maybe if it looks the same costs the same and sits in the same spot in the supermarket I won’t notice that I just got conned out of two eggs.

Lets not hang draw and quarter the egg producers of Australia just yet though, they are certainly not alone in these questionable packaging processes. There was a time when I was able to order a stubby or can of beer and know I was drinking 375ml of beer. But no beer producers of the world unite because you too are guilty of participating in this dirty little secret, 330ml, 345ml, 355ml, are all volumes that we now see sold in our liquor outlets as stubbies. I’m still waiting for the 380ml stubby sold at the same price (wishful thinking maybe). Smaller biscuits, less cereal, thinner bread slices, and a seemingly infinite choice of package sizes for consumers to choose from beg the question WHY?

Simple really, to distract us just long enough so that we don’t notice the price. To make it so difficult to work out what we are getting for our money that we don’t bother to question it. So what can we make of this “Camouflage Packaging” technique, when did food packagers decide that the beast way to increase profit margins was to steal from the very consumers that support their existence. Are these companies so devoid of new marketing ideas that the only way they feel they can make ends meet is to fleece there most loyal of customers.

So what does this all mean, what can we take from this Sunday morning sermon? Maybe it’s that loyalty is dead, just because you’ve eaten the same cereal for 35 years, don’t expect to get 15 breakfasts out of you next box just because you always have. Maybe it’s, beware the fancy new package. Whatever it is that old saying we all used to love, “the customer comes first” means little today. The number one person for businesses today is the shareholder, first, second, and last.

Anyway it’s time to get cracking on that breakfast, excuse me while I open my carton of TEN eggs!

Mondays Expert.